SINGLE MOM IN THE CITY

depending on the site -  you can get four for $50-$80... mine were second-hand but new. 6 for $12. I remember looking at patterns maybe in the Bay Red Deer or Calgary. Hoping I married someone who liked Mikasa who laughed when we did the dishes together. I was 18, what did I know? it is years later, two divorces. I still like Mikasa, they seemed like old friends in the second-hand store in Moose Jaw. I picked them up recognizing the solid fineness of quality. Different  than my dollar tree ones. I put them back,  I picked them up, I put them back. Indecisive I thought how happy  the would make me.   Like a child I watched her carefully wrap the Mikasa. The children and I  eat grilled cheese, salad and other things, off them. Sometimes I cry when I  wash the dishes alone. But the  pattern makes me happy, smile. I make sure all the egg is off them. They laugh in the soapy water. They squeal  when I dry them. With them I don't feel alone.  ...

It wasn't tik tok this time but a memory. A million moments  ago in Portland, WA. A boy's porch - a strange  custom. Sun tea ! The sun compelled me to remember the memory. The sun asked me to cut the lemon. The sun turned  the tap  for the water. Orange peako tea bags followed suit. They steeped, on the counter - in the sunshine. SUN TEA merrily made from a memory.  

I pull out the  newest  tea towel - a set. She just moved into her first owned  house. She took  the time  and bought  me towels - two. For my new life. I miss her voice,  but imagine it. As I wipe the droplets of water from the dishes. I miss the tea, the teaching, the friendship. Wrapped in this gift is a 100 memories. I dab the droplet that fell from my eye - with the center of the yellow flower.  

It's been in the family forever. I used to make trifle in it. hours days weeks months or maybe years ago. I told the kids, don't break it. Scottish/Irish heritage encased in fragile  glass. I hold  it  familiar with the weight and  memories. I pull out chips and pour them  into the bowl. The kiddos eyes are  huge. "go ahead," they confirm by their glances at one another Crazy! we hardly  ever eat chips they longingly look I smile and nod out of the bowl that crossed the ocean over 100 years ago they delicately pull chips individually they chew slowly savoring the salt the moment of the unprecedented the out of the  ordinary.  

The kiddos  are at the park. I'd doing dishes by hand, no dishwasher. I love  the blue soap it makes my dishes sing. A strange ache though. I don't know this view. Nothing is familiar. A tinge of sadness. A smattering of lonliness. Hope I look  at my plants, and pour them  banana tea...  

The kiddos think I'm a genius (not the 16 year old) the smaller ones Since moving in. I made banana tea for my plants. Also orange cleaner, they remind me. Annnddd... the other thing! Sun tea Thanks tik tok!  

I moved to a city two and a half hours away. In hopes of a better life, a job. I'm either brave or crazy with four kids in the house. Just one floor of a house a larger rental fee. The plate was from dollar tree the one that burnt down in the city  we came from. At the time it made me happy, the plate it probably still does and for now this is our home sweet home